Overwhelmed... unbiblical?

Some of you may know that life's been crazy here. So crazy, in fact, that one of my friends brought us dinner tonight because our fridge is down to nothing. We had our last can of black beans for lunch today and ate Dominoes for 2 days... seriously. And there's no grocery shopping time to be had. (Don't worry, Mom-- I'll go this weekend.)

I did have a moment to read through today's entry in My Utmost for His Highest that I highly (ha) recommend. It convicted me to the degree that I've taken a break from writing a paper to write about this to you and to myself.

Here's the entry- out of context- that caught my attention:

"Begin with the circumstances we are in-- our homes, our business, our country, the present crisis as it touches us and others-- are these things crushing us? Are they badgering us out of the presence of God and leaving us no time for worship?"...

Um... yes? Unfortunately, yes. Monday, I was blessed by a time with college students that I didn't want to have-- I wanted to be in the library-- but God really met me in worship there. And he changed my attitude from being one that lashed out at even my husband and centered me again on the reason for being here at seminary. But I'm back in this rut just a few days later, and I feel justified in my lack of attention to worship! Come on-- my fridge is empty because I don't have time to fill it. I'm justified, right?! Back to Oswald...

..."We run ahead of Him in a thousand and one activities, consequently we get so burdened with persons and with difficulties that we do not worship God, we do not intercede. If once the burden and the pressure come upon us and we are not in the worshipping attitude, it will produce not only hardness toward God but despair in our own souls."

Whew. No wonder I was crying last night over my Interpreting the New Testament paper. Come on, Megs. And I encourage you, too, to come with me back into a posture of worship that we might be able to surrender to God our burdens and pressures. I hope this song helps lead you into God's presence now.

God speaks!

Perhaps this should not be profound to me, but it is!

The first action God takes in Scripture is to speak. And by speaking, things are created.

Exodus 33 says that God spoke to Moses face-to-face, as to a friend.

In contrast, Scripture says that idols have eyes but do not see, mouths but do not speak (Isaiah 44).

We were challenged in class to consider how often we are like the Israelites, desiring God to act more like a golden calf. Be regal, in a place of honor, receiving our worship and be a point of reference for all the prayers we lift up. But God is not like the idols. He is LIVING, and he speaks. Are we listening? Do you expect him to talk to you?

Everyone who is of the truth listens to my voice -Jesus John 18:37

National Day of Prayer

This is an excerpt (the less politically laced excerpt) from the Os Hillman daily work devotional I receive via email:

"The angel of the LORD gave this charge to Joshua: "This is what the LORD Almighty says: If you will walk in my ways and keep my requirements, then you will govern my house and have charge of my courts, and I will give you a place among these standing here'" (Zech 3:6-7).

On September 17th, 1796, George Washington said, "It is impossible to rightly govern the world without God and the Bible." In His Prayer At Valley Forge, he entreated God: "Almighty and eternal Lord God, the great Creator of heaven and earth, and the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ; look down from heaven in pity and compassion upon me Thy servant, who humbly prostrates myself before Thee."

This is not another political email.  As Derek Webb sings, "My first allegiance is not to a flag, a country or a man, a democracy or blood.  It's to a king and a kingdom."  Please join with me in praying that God's will will be done here on earth as it is in heaven.  I pray that his kingdom will come quickly in its fullness.  And in the meantime, I pray that we will have a flag, a country, a President, a government and families that stand for the Lord that walk in his ways, that know his grace and will govern over us with a spirit of humility before the Almighty and eternal Lord God.

Slumdog & India

I have been overwhelmed, once again, but the plight of an entire nation of people.  Once again I find myself with the saints saying, How long O Lord??  How much longer will you withhold your justice?

(caveat) I think I'm going to work backwards on this one, so starting with where I am now and then backing up to where this whole thing started.  Please be patient with me-- I am a work in progress and so is this thought process.

Most recently, India has been on my mind because one of Beth Moore's daughters, Melissa, is in India with Compassion International.  For her story, click on the "melissa in india" blog link on the left.  Were it not for the droning of the florescents in my cube to keep me aware of where I am, I would have wept at her pictures.  The last one is almost too much for me.

There have been many conversations between Melissa and the movie, but the recent interest in India was kicked off with Slumdog Millionaire.  I recognize that I am one to be very emotionally wrapped up in a movie.  I jump at the slightest provocation and rarely watch a moving movie without dreaming about it later that night.  But this one was something else altogether.  I was on my feet for a good chunk of the movie, unable to bear even being in the same room when Latika is abused (granted, it is implied but OH MY the implication was enough), when the poor child's eyes are blinded by a cruel, greedy man, or when Jamal was tortured.  This was a month ago and I still know their names.  I was told this weekend, "but it has a happy ending!"  I can't help but recognize that for so many Indian children, there is not the hope of the million dollars.  

This led me to a frantic, soul crushing discussion with Larry and a close friend.  What hope at all can I offer the children of India?  Do I truly believe that the name of Jesus is hope enough when I cannot change even their hunger?  I am frustrated with myself for even having that question.  But a that close friend pointed out to me that the justice and provision I have pictured for these impoverished children is not God's justice- it is not nearly as perfect and it is focused on the circumstances of this world.  God's justice, however, is perfect.  Beth Moore talked about how God's justice is balanced with his love.  I cannot extract or separate God's perfect justice from His perfect love.

So I have been meditating on John 16:33

I have said these things to you (about Jesus going back into heaven) that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have tribulation.  But take heart, I have overcome the world.

I do believe, and for the sake of those who are truly suffering in this world, I must believe that Jesus has already overcome the world.  They will receive justice and every blessing from the Father.  He sees them and knows them each by name.

India began to be written on my heart back in high school, when a friend sought to go to India for the summer.  She must have already known that the hope offered in the name of Jesus and his redeeming work on the cross was and is sufficient for the poor in India.  That same assurance has been preached to me again and again through the powerful witness of those who have seen God's grace bring life in India: when she returned to India, and then another friend from high school went to spread the good news, and then a couple with 10/40 Connections spoke of the movement of God there, then when a friend asked me to pray for her burden for India, then when our church began sponsoring an orphanage there that takes girls off the streets and out of prostitution and gives them a home, and now with Melissa.  If you would courageously considering opening your heart to prayer for the nations, I believe that you will find as I have that the name of Jesus IS the power and grace, the love and justice, and the profound hope for all who are lost and all who are suffering.  May it be so.

Cleaning House

Does cleaning your house ever seem intimidating?

Two weeks ago was like this for me-- I distinctly remember running the dishwasher on Wednesday but by Sunday not a single dish had been put away. For those of you who know how much I like to cook, you can imagine what that did for my counters. And you KNOW if I let my kitchen get like that, then you know there were 15 loads of laundry (not exaggerating), board games out, dead flowers in vases, floor hadn't swept since ridiculously long ago, dust you can write in, etc. I know-- really makes you want to come visit, right?

Does really diving into a life of prayer ever seem intimidating?
Intimidating may not be the right word. Perhaps overwhelming.

Here's the connection-- that weekend I didn't feel like making a move to clean anything because even emptying the dishwasher would lead me down a path that trapped me in my house for several hours in a fury of cleaning. Better to declare 24 hours of no kitchen duties and wait until later. Have you ever felt like that with prayer? That if you really wanted to take to the Lord everything on your mind you would need 10 hours? Better just to take a nap? I feel you.

I often feel the need to take things to the Lord like, one-sie, two-sie. You know-- yes Jesus I remember so-and-so! Thanks for reminding me-- they need your love right now or your favor or favor with men, your encouragement, healing etc. That is satisfying and full of trust and faith. Just like cleaning up the stack of paperwork that needs immediate attention leads to a sense of satisfaction and one loose end tied up. But I've been feeling the need for a deep clean.

It's been rare, but I've had the occasion when I get into a good rhythm with my house and the laundry basket never seems crazy overflowing because I've (or my amazing DH has) been keeping up with it, the dishes get put away right after I've done them, and the blanket stays folded on the back of the couch. Then when Saturday comes-- watch out!-- maybe the floor will get mopped! Maybe the closet will get cleaned out and salvaged for good will! Well I'll tell you what, I am craving a prayer life where the immediate needs are tucked away in the Lord's hands daily, the worries of the week have been put away regularly at the throne of Christ and when I do have the extra moment to spend-- really spend-- in prayer, we can work on praying through the real scrubs my life and my character need. I also want time where I can be still with the Lord and not feel like I'm catching up on a week's worth of need and thanks. I believe that this is the type of relationship God wants to have with us, too.

Any tips for keeping up with a growing list of prayer requests?